The book examines abuse (not clerical or institutional abuse). It explores boundaries and how abuse is an invasion of boundaries. It explores physical, emotional, verbal and financial abuse. The book looks at the abusive personality type, and examines workplace and school bullying. Child abuse is explored, and the issue of staying in or leaving an abusive environment. The question of what happens if one leaves and if it is possible to change an abusive personality is examined. A client's story is contained in the book and this gives a human aspect to the exploration.
The majority of relationships are healthy, and abuse can never thrive in a healthy relationship. Love is the basis of all healthy relationships. However, abuse is common and universal. It is perpetrated by both men and women. It is found in every social, cultural, economic and racial background.
This book examines five types of abuse - physical, emotional/psychological/mental, verbal, sexual, and financial/economic. The forms of abuse will be looked at in the context of intimate relationships. Bullying in the workplace, which can contain all of these types of abuse, is also explored. The book will focus on adult victims and highlight the harrowing behaviours of abusers. However, because of its importance, there is also a chapter on child abuse.
Abuse is driven by toxic shame and rage, and is engraved in the biology of the brain. It is also the offspring of childhood conditioning and can be a learned behaviour, underpinned by irrational thoughts, beliefs and values. Driven by these, abusers use power and control to humiliate the victims, trample on their boundaries, and exert control over them. Among other aspects, this book will explore how the abuser tries to control the victim's time and their material resources; controlling by body language and gestures, by confusing the victim and defining their reality, by blaming, and by reducing the victim's status through demeaning behaviours, violence, sexual control, or perhaps financial manipulation.
|Publisher:||Cork University Press|
|Product dimensions:||5.10(w) x 7.80(h) x 0.80(d)|
Table of Contents
1 Boundaries 5
2 The Abusive Personality: warning signs of possible abuse in new and existing relationships 18
3 Physical Abuse 40
4 Verbal Abuse 54
5 Emotional/Psychological Abuse 64
6 Sexual Abuse 75
7 Financial Abuse 86
8 Abuse in the Workplace and in School 97
9 Child Abuse 114
10 Remaining in or Leaving an Abusive Relationship 139
11 What Happens after Leaving an Abusive Relationship? 152
12 If You Have an Abusive Personality, Can You Change? 179
13 Afterword 192