She's Not There: A Life in Two Genders

She's Not There: A Life in Two Genders

by Jennifer Finney Boylan
4.2 42

Paperback(Reprint)

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Overview

She's Not There: A Life in Two Genders by Jennifer Finney Boylan

The provocative bestseller She’s Not There is the exuberant memoir of a man named James who became a woman named Jenny.

She’s Not There is the story of a person changing genders, the story of a person bearing and finally revealing a complex secret; above all, it is a love story. By turns hilarious and deeply moving, Jennifer Finney Boylan explores the remarkable territory that lies between men and women, examines changing friendships, and rejoices in the redeeming power of family. She’s Not There is a portrait of a loving marriage—the love of James for his wife, Grace, and, against all odds, the enduring love of Grace for the woman who becomes her “sister,” Jenny.

To this extraordinary true story, Boylan brings the humorous, fresh voice that won her accolades as one of the best comic novelists of her generation. With her distinctive and winning perspective, She’s Not There explores the dramatic outward changes and unexpected results of life as a woman: Jenny fights the urge to eat salad, while James consumed plates of ribs; gone is the stability of “one damn mood, all the damn time.”

While Boylan’s own secret was unusual, to say the least, she captures the universal sense of feeling uncomfortable, out of sorts with the world, and misunderstood by her peers. Jenny is supported on her journey by her best friend, novelist Richard Russo, who goes from begging his friend to “Be a man” (in every sense of the word) to accepting her as an attractive, buoyant woman. “The most unexpected thing,” Russo writes in his Afterword to the book, “is in how Jenny’s story we recognize our shared humanity.”

As James evolves into Jennifer in scenes that are by turns tender, startling, and witty, a marvelously human perspective emerges on issues of love, sex, and the fascinating relationship between our physical and our intuitive selves. Through the clear eyes of a truly remarkable woman, She’s Not There provides a new window on the often confounding process of accepting ourselves.

Product Details

ISBN-13: 9780385346979
Publisher: Crown/Archetype
Publication date: 04/30/2013
Edition description: Reprint
Pages: 352
Sales rank: 223,189
Product dimensions: 7.80(w) x 5.20(h) x 0.90(d)

About the Author

JENNIFER FINNEY BOYLAN, author of fourteen books, is the inaugural Anna Quindlen Writer in Residence at Barnard College of Columbia University in the City of New York and is Special Advisor to the president of Colby College in Maine. She has been a contributor to the Op-Ed page of the New York Times since 2007; in 2013 she became Contributing Opinion Writer for the page. Jenny also serves on the Board of Trustees of the Kinsey Institute for Research on Sex, Gender, and Reproduction. She is the national co-chair of the Board of Directors of GLAAD, the media advocacy group for LGBT people worldwide, and serves as a consultant to several television series. A novelist, memoirist, and short-story writer, she is also a nationally known advocate for civil rights. Jenny has appeared on the Oprah Winfrey Show on four occasions; Live with Larry King twice; the Today show; the Barbara Walters Special; and NPR's Marketplace and Talk of the Nation. She has also been the subject of documentaries on CBS News' 48 Hours and The History Channel. She lives in New York City and in Belgrade Lakes, Maine, with her wife, Deedie, and her two sons, Zach and Sean.

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She's Not There 4.2 out of 5 based on 0 ratings. 42 reviews.
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
I read Jennifer's book when my son told us that he was transgender and was switching genders. Her book helped me to understand how my daughter was feeling and what she was going to go through. It is a very moving and enlightening book. Thank you for writing about you and your family, and for being so honest. Your book was easy to read and understand. THANK YOU!!! You are wonderful!!!
Guest More than 1 year ago
Jenny went though a bizarre experience during her journal from being a man to becoming a woman. Although a happy Jenny is quite truthful and open in telling her story, I felt sad for those around her especially her/his wife Grace and two sons from his/her pre-Jenny life. What would you do if your spouse changed genders? How would you feel if this was your mother or father? Overall this book is worth reading. There were parts that frustrated me but others that made me smile. It held my attention and made me understand the struggle of those who don't feel that thier outward appearance matches thier inner self-concepts.
Guest More than 1 year ago
This is a fantastic book that not only looks at the life of a transgender, but also the life of her family. It is thought provoking and mindful. You struggle with Jenny from childhood confusion, to marriage, fatherhood, coming out, the sex change, and so much more. One of the best things about this book is that it not only focuses of Jenny and her struggle, but also the struggles of her family. This family shows an undying love for one another and support system that every family in Amarica hopes for!!! As a sociology and psychology graduate I found this book to be one of the most beautiful and rememberable books I've ever read.
Guest More than 1 year ago
College students enjoyed this read. Light -hearted and comical, the book changed many students' minds against the socially constructed, dichotomous nature of gender in our culture. Rather than criticizing Boylan for being selfish in her decision to change genders, students began to think that perhaps the question should be re-directed: How can society be so selfish as to disallow transgendered individuals the options to become who they are?
Guest More than 1 year ago
I saw Jenny on Oprah. I decided to read the book. This book changed my mind and point of view on transgenders. I actually feel as though I know Jenny now. It is a book about being faithful, having courage and love. Good book highly recommended.
yakette1 More than 1 year ago
This was a wonderful book for someone who is truly interested in the plight of the transexual person. The story is poignant and touching. I would not recommend it for anyone who has discriminatory tendencies concerning gender issues. A truly amazing story!
Guest More than 1 year ago
After reading this book I realized how very much we all have in common with each other. I also realized that fear has a way of keeping us static in our lives. This book motivated me into making great leaps in my life-finally! Thanks Jen, I owe you a big one!
Guest More than 1 year ago
This was one of the most interesting, thought provoking and wonderful books I have read in my life. James, Jennifer and Grace as well as Richard Russo are simply fantastic and special people. Thanks Grace for being a first rate human being, thanks Richard for defining FRIEND and thanks to the children for being children and part of the epoxy that holds these special people together. And Thank you Jennifer for having the guts to do what was right, become you.
Guest More than 1 year ago
I really enjoyed learning about Jenny's struggle with her gender. It also makes you examine what it means to just be your self. It is well-written and takes a light-hearted and humorous approach to a serious topic.
DaBee More than 1 year ago
I loved it. It is so real, moving, and inspirational. I truly admire Jenny and her journey towards becoming her real self. Would recommend this to anybody!
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Anonymous More than 1 year ago
This book took me months to read. It is a very personal story, one that I found to be shockingly intimate. The authors use of memory flashbacks, descriptive scenery and the ability to make the reader feel as if they are a silent member of a group is very realistic . Witnessing the experiences in the minds eye and feeling them with the heart. It is as if at times, you the reader, are right there with Jenny as she undergoes her journey. The entire book is very well put together. There were times while reading the book that all I could do was think to myself how I understood. I would recommend this book to anyone who is educated and open minded. It will off you the rare chance to share a very real and very personal piece of this womans life.
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Meg_and_Olivia More than 1 year ago
I picked this book up when it was in the $1.99 bin. At that price it was worth a risk. However, I was pleasantly surprised because this was a really amazing autobiography written by a transgendered woman. The author does a superb job of telling her story and explaining how she first began to feel like a woman. The author doesn't sugarcoat the story and she doesn't bash society for not accepting the choices she's made in life. Instead, the author tells a very human story about a young man not feeling right in his own skin and his attempts to overcome this feeling. Eventually, he realizes that he can never be truly happy as a man and decides to become a woman. Throughout the process, the author describes tough choices and broken relationships, but maintains a good sense of humor. Overall, it was a very very good read. I lent this book to a friend whose family member recently announced that he was undergoing the process to become a woman. Though supportive, my friend was unable to fully accept this decision. After reading this book, my friend was better able to understand her family member's choice and it was easier to come to peace with the decision.
LeonaHelen More than 1 year ago
I truly love this book. It is an "Act One" kind of book; It leaves us wanting more...It creates a, "what Happens Next?" for the reader. I am committed to Ms. Boylan's writing for the rest of my time. I highly recommend the "Act Two" novel, I'm Looking Through you." Written in an imaginative, thoughtful, and stimulating style, even those who thought they can not identify with transsexuals find that they easily can empathise. When transgender history is written, this will be a keystone of literature that mainstreams us. Thanks for opening your heart, Jennifer!
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
Anonymous More than 1 year ago
I really enjoyed this frank account of what the author went through in her quest to make her body match her identity. The writing is lyrical and quite poignant in parts and laugh-out-loud funny in others.